The Way I Used to Be

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The lovely young lady gets raped by the best friend of his brother. Thirteen years old. How a brief period of time—just five minutes—can completely alter your personality and transform you into someone you never would have imagined becoming. That said, I think books like these are very important because there really is no right way to be a victim, and even if you wear revealing clothes or sleep around, rape is still rape. Painting people as "ideal victims" contributes to rape culture and makes it easier to write off testimony. So I'm really glad that books like this exist, which explore what trauma looks like in more muddied waters. Bless the morbid and gloomy person who brought this book onto the cruise ship so that I could read it, too. The Way I Used To Be is a fantastic portrayal of trauma. I cannot remember the last time I had such an intense, emotional response to a book, especially one that is not a part of a series that I had already been invested in. I wanted SO BADLY for Eden to tell someone what had happened to her, more than I think I have ever wanted a character to do ANYTHING. Eden’s story is raw, unflinching, emotional, powerful, and so so real. This book is not for the faint of heart – it is gritty and destructive, yet moving. So even with the extended-timeline draw Smith fails to utilize to its full potential, this is just another forgettable SA/A novel that acts like responses other than fear or hypersexuality don’t happen. Survivors who didn’t react either way (like me) are yet again alienated and ignored in SA/A survival narratives. I can name three novels off the top of my head that follow all the same paths and hit all the same notes. It’s an unoriginal novel about an experience so varied writers should never run out of new narratives to introduce the world to. We are not tropes.

As part of my work with UN Women, I have started reading OUR SHARED SHELF IS CURRENTLY DORMANT AND NOT MANAGED BY EMMA AND HER TEAM. Eden is a fascinating, wonderful character. I struggled so much with her in the beginning of the novel, but I feel she challenged me as a person due to this. She consistently hurts people who care for her, creates many more problems for herself, and makes so many horrible decisions as being raped begins to alter her perception of the world. I had such a difficult time loving her in the beginning because of all her harmful actions, but I had to keep reminding myself that this is an expression of trauma and while people must take responsibility for their actions, I should not pass such harsh judgement on someone who is responding to such a horrific event that will have changed her life forever. Eden’s characterization is so powerful and authentic, and her development is so well constructed throughout the story that I never could have expected to love her as much as I did by the conclusion of the novel. I am so appreciative to Eden for opening my eyes to an experience unique to her and many other survivors of sexual assault and her story is not one I will forget any time soon. uh this book ripped my heart out but i loved every second of it. i dont think ive read a book that handles rape this well since i read speak. and speak is like extraordinary, so that's definitely a compliment. i really really enjoyed this book and i found eden to be one of the most developed characters i've ever read about. Don’t be embarrassed,” she says with a laugh. “It’s fine, really, I promise.” She stands over me, looking taller than she ever has before, handing me my robe, oblivious of my Tuesday underwear crumpled at her feet.PDF / EPUB File Name: The_Way_I_Used_to_Be_-_Amber_Smith.pdf, The_Way_I_Used_to_Be_-_Amber_Smith.epub It felt like a very natural progression for me, moving from visual art to writing. I always wrote--a lot of journaling, poetry, that sort of thing. And when I got out of college and grad school, I found that for the first time in many years, I no longer had a studio space to create art in, so I started going smaller and smaller with my artwork, incorporating mixed media and pieces of my writing and poetry into the art I was making, until writing ended up becoming my main creative outlet.

I wanted for her to tell somone just ANYONE. It frustrated me So. Many. Times. Like it would've made the whole book a bit more better and understanding. I get it how hard it can be how depressing it can be.this talks about the effects rape can have. over a timeline of 4 years, we see how our main character develops. how her relationships with basically everything changes, including friends, family, love, sex, new acquaintances, school, just her entire life.

I've read many books about teenage girls who were raped, from the classic Speak, to last year's harrowing tale of how a girl is let down by everyone around her - All the Rage, to the recent book about a girl with a strong support network - Exit, Pursued by a Bear. These books are incredibly important for fostering discussion about rape, its aftermath, and the way we treat rape victims. The Way I Used to Be, however, adds nothing but more paper to the pile. My heart was torn apart right from the first chapter! And as the story progressed, we gained insight into Edy's breakdown. She leaves her pals in the middle of life, gets drunk like there's no tomorrow, and sleeps with individuals to undo the effects that night's events had on her body and mind.

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Asides from Eden and the shifting chapters, a character I really enjoyed was Josh—even if I didn’t understand why he put up with Eden’s crap; though I guess that’s what love does to you. Still. He was a real sweetheart to her when no one else was. I mean, the way he agreed to meet up with Eden (after they’d been broken up for years), because she “needed to see him” was beyond me. No guy would do that nowadays, without at least some explanation (at least, I don’t think so). Then again, like my mom always tells me: “It’s not reality; you’re reading a book! Stop confusing the two!” I feel as if the best way to describe this book is the unforgettable experience I had listening to the last 3 hours of the audiobook at 1:30 in the morning in the pitch dark while bawling my eyes out and completely unable to breathe. It was THAT amazing.

But that’s not what’s going to happen today, I know, as I sit in my bed, staring at my stained skin in disbelief, my hand shaking as I press it against my mouth. Even with those qualms, I still appreciated what this story had to offer. I still think this is a narrative worth perusing because it shows some hard fought battles and an eye to horrifying experiences that happen far more often than not with experiences with rape/SA. But I would also argue that it's important for people (teens and adults) to realize that survivors of rape are not all-encompassed by the terms "broken" or "damaged" - nor are their shaped by that experience alone. This is something that I feel many YA and NA books need to recognize and expand upon, and I feel like "The Way I Used to Be" could've had further expansion to make it hit home that much more. This is the way the world works, apparently. I can’t believe I’m only figuring this out now. It’s simple really. All you have to do is act like you’re normal and okay, and people start treating you that way.” It felt like a very natural progression for me, moving from visual art to writing. I always wrote--a lot of j …more What great questions--thanks for asking!

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I can hear him breathing on the other side of the door,breathing oddly,like,unevenly. But,no,it's not him just breathing,I realize slowly. He's crying. And I kneel there on the other side of the door that might as well be the other side of the galaxy,feeling so empty,so dead inside.” In the end the way he came again to save her 💔😖 i literally cried reading that. IT WAS TOO CUTE. Btw ik it would never NEVER happen in real life. 😪which made me cry even more I hate all of this happened to Edy. If she would have only told when it happened, but we are not all the same. Some have to hide it, feel like they have to at any rate. Please don't hide this girls, call the cops, get it out. YOU WILL NEVER BE ALONE IN THIS FIGHT! Authors, if you are a member of the Goodreads Author Program, you can edit information about your own books. Find out how in this guide.